Fight Club

Written on Unfolding Diamonds October 28, 2010

This topic is so great. I feel like in the last year and half since I wrote this I could add way more. I am just going to leave it at this. It takes a heart of courage to fight. Check your heart on this matter...what do you think?

What is the first thing that comes to your mind when I say the word, FIGHT?

Is it a verbal argument, where words and spears are thrown with the intent to hurt? Or, maybe for you, it’s where fists are literally thrown and physical injury occurs?

Well, I’m not talking about either. I’m making reference to a sort of fighting, that these days just doesn’t happen enough…..

FIGHTING FOR UNDERSTANDING

This is a fight that isn’t sought to injure, but mend. A reaching out for the heart of another. The decision to stand firm and stay until a resolution occurs.

We live in a day and age of SELFISH people. We are all about ME!!! I’m talking about me too! This is just another topic I write about because it’s a road I have walked. I never ever knew what it meant to stay and fight for understanding. If I felt hurt, mad, or even misunderstood, I tossed on my sneakers and ran!!! Ran away from my family, my friends, my relationship, I just chose to run. It was too hard to stay.

Why was it so hard for you Lu? Well you really want to know? Vulnerability, yep…that simple little word. I would have nothing of the sort. Let others see I was hurt, sad, upset…nope they just saw I was mad, annoyed, or impatient. That was way safer. It was way easier to toss those emotions out and distance my heart.

I never chose to stay and fight for understanding or to even offer up my own heart so the other could better understand where I was coming from. I just ran away from it.

We also live in a society that is not afraid to toss another under the bus, to pierce with words, to gossip, to just show no sort of respect. It’s sad actually. The thing is that I now find that so sad when before I just joined ‘em. I would speak words and then wished I hadn’t, but they were already out…so deal with it!!!! Well not anymore. I want to be careful with my tongue. I want to be vulnerable with my heart when it’s safe. I want to fight for understanding with those that I love.

So I feel like maybe I could be rambling so I’m going to give you an idea of what exactly what I mean for it’s something I am very much learning.

Have you ever walked into a room of some people and when you walk in it gets a little quiet and you automatically assume they were talking about you? Did you ever think that it might never have been that at all? Yeah me either. How many times have you gone back to those people and just asked them? Why not? Were you afraid you might be rejected, afraid of wounding your pride? Well here’s what happens is that your mind and heart begins to run and run and run as to what they could have been talking about. In that very moment seeds of uncertainty, untruth, and anger begin to take root and grow….they take over and they begin to effect the perception of those in the room. You may become bitter, resentful….ever thought maybe there was nothing being said at all?

Why not just ask….I know, that’s a crazy thought, that’s a little scary, but it’s part of the fight. Or if they were talking maybe it wasn’t anything bad. Ask. Desire to understand.

When you want to run in the middle of a conversation where you feel hurt, stay and fight, when you hurt another, REPENT, stay, and fight...their hearts on the line.

We can no longer make assumptions...because the saying still rings true...when we assume it makes an "ass out of you and me". Assumptions on the behalf of another person are so DANGEROUS. It's send our minds and our hearts down a very nasty path. Take your pick..self-pity, self-rejection, anger, bitterness, resentment...you get the point.

Fight, fight, fight for the hearts of those that matter. If they don’t matter, that’s a totally different story. If they do matter then close the gap that could begin between two hearts. When there is understanding found, hearts love more, hearts trust more, and relationships thrive.

PS...it's a light sabre in my hand...

No More Friendly Fire

I Love our Lord's example in the above scripture. As the Pharisees and Scribes constantly sought to provoke Jesus... he always seemed to answer with such serenity and tranquility. Jesus never was and never is uptight. And yet the minute someone provokes me (not on purpose I'm sure), my reaction is most definitely not tranquil. How destructive this is to the Body of Christ!! This is a call for unity within our church community. Lets take a stand together and not allow anymore division from within.

Lets stop the "friendly fire"

{As the bible indicates throughout, unity doesn't happen through the pointing of fingers at one another's spiritual condition. Unity starts with me.}

Here are a few ways to confront this issue in which we seem to struggle... not excluding myself of course. This may offend some, but none of us are guiltless! As my friend Lindsay so poignantly said, "Welcome to the no fluff zone." So here it goes...


1. Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Luke 6:45
Before a critical statement can come out of our mouth it is already formed in our heart. Isolate the thought, and immediately take it to the Lord. Get rid of it fast! If you are anything like me, you may have to do this multiple times before it goes away.


2. The tongue has the power of life and death. Proverbs 18:21
Are you speaking life giving words to or about or family (includes in-laws, cousins, uncles, you get the picture)? Chances are if your talking about your immediate family, you will fall into the trap of talking about your church family as well. I like to justify myself by saying, "I need prayer about this" or "sorry for venting". WHOOPS!


3. ...and there are diversities of operation, but it is the same God which worketh all in all. 1Corinthians 12:6
DO NOT compare yourselves (gifts, talents, etc..) to others! This one is especially difficult amongst the women. You will end up becoming jealous toward that person Jesus loves so much, or you will walk in fear that you aren't good enough.[Side note: If I had to compared myself to the incredibly talented women that write on this blog, I would NOT be writing this post today. I would be too fearful....]

4. ...And He gave us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother. 1John 4:21
Love the person who is rude to you.... for love covers a multitude of sin. Guess what?? We are not called to love the lovely, but the unlovely.

  Last, but not least......

5. Where sin abounds, Grace abounds that much more. Romans 5:20
So thankful for the Grace administered to me on a moment to moment basis...YAY and AMEN!!